September 1, 2006

• Battle Pride

  Interrupted a fistfight today, in front of the house next door.  Two boys, late jr. high / very early high school, were suddenly slugging it out, without the customary throng of haters hemming them in and egging them on; just three other kids, surprised and running about yelling "Fight! A fight!" 

  They broke off when I approached using my In Charge voice, and neither of them seemed too hurt: they had stayed on their feet and swinging, and aren't old enough yet to really injure one another in that mode.  (Sidewalks and other obstacles or weapons are what cause most injuries in the average under-15 melee... that and kicking or stomping on a person when they are down)

  The younger one retreated with as much indignant dignity as he could muster; the older one coldly turned his back on his opponent and, defensive, explained that the younger kid had stolen his skateboard.  Already more kids and teens were gathering like moths, and one older girl, who had been heading for the other boy, overheard- pursed her lips- and said "Want me to get it back for you?"  Surprised, the other boy said, "Yeah... sure."

  I don't know how that part worked out, but for the next half hour, I witnessed the strangest thing: person after person, mostly peers and older teens, coming out to congratulate the younger combatant on standing up to the bigger kid, on fighting so fiercely, on not backing down.  Even though one of his friends virtually admitted he'd brought it on himself by stealing a skateboard.  The other boy apparently received the same treatment, but he had kept on walking so his cloud of glory left with him.

  A penny has dropped now for me: I understand for the first time the incredibly high value placed on courage and on fighting, whether you are right or not.  One example in particular stands out vividly: an attractive girl, perhaps fifteen, came sprinting up to the young pugilist-- her expression was so fierce I thought she was going to scold him.  No: she hugged and kissed him and whispered something along the lines of "I am so proud of you, little man!  Don't let no one push you around, no matter what!"

  What power those words would have had on me at that boy's age!  Especially from a pretty girl.  What universal and intense acclaim for fighting... any fight, for any reason.  That you prove your courage to fight seems to be the main thing.  No wonder so many shoulders have chips on them in the inner city.

  What feedback did you receive for getting into a fight, when you were young and impressionable?

  • 1:18 am
  • 2 Comments